13 PaGeS LoNg

WhErE tHe PaGeS oF tHiS bOoK nEvEr EnD

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Elder Page nears the end

Hey everyone,
Thank you so much for your love and letters. I love to hear how everything is going with you all. It sounds like you are really enjoying your summer. I'm glad that you are getting so much time together.
It sounds like Zach is doing well in Japan. I'm glad he met Sis. R :) She is really sweet. I'm glad Zach W. is doing well too! That would be awesome if he went to BYU Law school :) He is such an example to me.
Things with me are alright. THis week we finally met the new mission pres. The Kilpacks are great:) Thare are super nice & seem really excited about the work.
Elder Densley is recovering well. He's really postive about everything. With him being sick I've had time to do alot of reflecting. Now that I'm coming to the end I've been having a lot of thoughts about the last 2 years. Have I done enough? Have I grown? Have I become Who I need to be? I've found that with the excitement of coming home comes fears of all that lies ahead, school, work, marriage. Am I ready for all of that...am I ready to leave my mission? I feel so torn and confused.
Keep me in your prayers, I need them more than ever.
I read in Alma 42. I felt really connected to Alma's son. I've made mistakes & sinned & felt that there was no hope for me. Inadequecy comes alot as a missionary. I read the last verse and felt peace from Alma vs. 27 all are invited to receive the waters of life. We are not compelled! Agency allows freedon to chose. I've felt that in inviting others to drink from the living water of Christ. We will never thirst as we go to him. We fall and slip. We constantly sin and mess up. It would seem all hope is lost in the unpayable demands of justice. We cry within ourselves, " I don't have the means to pay the debt" We feel sorrow. From this pain comes the desire to repent. I'm so grateful for the sorrow I feel that pushes me to my knees. Humility, how much I need more of it. Pride continually seems to creep into my life in all forms. How can I call others to come to Christ when I still am so far from being perfect as He is? I am a sinner and feel as Nephi encompassed by the sins that so easily beset me. The last verse made me feel Christ's love for me. With my sin and mistakes. The Savior says, "stand, go, thrust in the sickle, they sins are forgiven you.
I know that peace and true joy can only be found in Christ. He is mindful of ALL his children. He is our Savior. It's true! We have hope. He is the rock of our salvation. I am in awe at his perfect nature and love for all and that we can know and understand who he truly is and He is through the gospel.
I love you all You have helped me be more like my Savior through your examples. I am so undeserving of the blessins that have been piled at my feet. I am grateful!
Have a great week:)
Elder Page

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